There is a lot of talk within global financial circles about France losing its AAA rating, following the path of my home country, the United States.  I really started to buy into this idea, but just when I thought that France had no real shot of warding off this downgrade, BAM!!!, they go ahead and COMPLETELY REDEEM THEMSELVES!  I am happy to announce that France has officially safeguarded itself from financial collapse!  How, you ask?  Three simple words…Baguette Vending Machine.

 

 

I am really excited about this new-found technology.  It is far better than the baguette dispenser that I have been designing (pictured below).

While my machine, which would have been called Hip Hip Beret, Baguette It While It’s Hot, or, because of the claw mechanism, Pinch a Loaf, had some serious potential, I think that my French counterparts have really hit the nail on the head.  Now, when walking the streets of Paris, you never have to experience the disappointment of not being able to satisfy a baguette craving.  Given that there are only between 5 and 10 cafes, bakeries, and bistros per city block in Paris, this invention could not have come soon enough.  Since the Baguette-To-Go market is now fully saturated, I think I’m going to set my gaze upon similar markets within the US.  Here are my current vending machine ideas:

1. Corned Beef Hash –> Possible names: Cash for Hash, Crispy Beef Box

2. Lutefisk –> Possible names: Food?, Fish-Lye-Buy, Caustic Delights

3. 1000 Year Old Eggs –> Possible names: Ova the Top, Mummy for you Tummy, Preserved Birds

Keep an eye out for my treats for the streets!

Advertisement